[ABC ficlet] INJUSTICE!

[babygray]

An Alphabetized Noisefic: Gundam Wing entry.

Title: INJUSTICE!
Author: babygray
Pairing: 5+Nataku, 1+Relena (hinted), 1+2 (hinted), 5+Sally, 5+Treize, 3+5, 2+Relena (mentioned), 3+Catherine (mentioned)
Warnings: Typos. No beta. Objectivism, bad use of the word 'emasculate', implied incest? for a joke, and Relena-bashing (sorry).
Disclaimer: This is just fanfiction, non-profit and just for fun.
Notes: Have you ever seen the Late Night with Conan O'Brien sketch around a Brit rocker commenting on inappropriate responses?. While I figure out just what that's all about, here's a noisefic inspired by it.
Word Count: 340
Summary: A series of things that may or may not be Just.

Wufei dumped the contents of a bottle of baby oil on Nataku’s foot. After taking off his clothes, he began rubbing his naked body against the oiled piece of gundamnium without a rational care in the world.

Afterwards, he realized the error of his ways as Duo treated the other pilots to the scene via the security tapes.

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INJUSTICE!

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Catherine, feeling that she needed ‘more practice’, went to the nearest Kinko’s ™ and had a photo of Trowa in his clown costume blown up to full-size. When it was ready, she rushed home and immediately tacked the full-life Trowa to a wall. For the rest of the afternoon and well into the night, she practiced her knife-throwing with the paper blowup.

Much to Trowa’s fright the next morning, the paper blowup had a rough, gaping hole where its crotch should have been.

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INJUSTICE!

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Relena, in an attempt to be more like Dorothy-

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INJUSTICE!

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Relena, in an attempt to be more like Heero-

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INJUSTICE!

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Relena, in an attempt to get Heero...

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That’s better...

~~

... goes to a nearby discount beauty supply store and buys a long hair braid. Unfortunately, she got brown instead of blonde, so even before she reached Heero, the local hell-children had ripped it out.

Afterwards, the hell-children all received a treat from a guy with real hair coming out of his head.

~~

... Just.

~~

Tough crowd.

Wufei decided one night to have that sex-change operation.

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INJUSTICE!

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Duo decided that same night to emasculate himself by shaving his hair off and becoming a monk.

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INJUSTICE!

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Dorothy decided that peace Was the answer, shaved off her eyebrows, and became a nun.

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In.... um...

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Duo decides Relena’s really hot.

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INJUSTICE!

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Trowa decides Catherine’s really hot.

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DISGUSTING!

~~

Sally and Treize have a running bet between them. Whoever beds Wufei first gets half the money in the pool, while whoever get the bet right gets the other half. Of course, both bet themselves to be the winner. They went about trying to seduce the boy, but, unfortunately for them, Quatre needed the money and won. The other half was given to a charity: the Winner Orphans Trust.

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INJUSTICE!

~~

Really?

~~~~end