babygray

"Past performance does not guarantee future results."

Comic City was last Sunday, and it was... okay.

I sold nothing. However, I did finally start reading Casket of Souls, so that's something.

Have you ever read any of Lynn Flewelling's Nightrunner books? They are fantastic, yo. Heroic fantasy, all sorts of magic, fun characters, and political intrigue. Plus, all the Bi the Way and UST. Casket's writing was a bit weird in the first couple of chapters, but by the time I got to the climax, I was crying and pumping my fist and cooing over love blooming, though not at the same time.

... Did you notice how I sidetracked from Comic City? It's almost like I don't want to talk about it.

It took me a bit to get over my disappointment. I put myself out there, and left feeling very sad. It's obvious that my skin isn't thick enough, not if I felt like I (and not my work) had been rejected. I try to take solace that it was my first time, the venue was very small, the people across from my table had about as many customers as I had, and people did look. They didn't buy, but they looked. Not what I hoped for, but I can take that.

I have to. It's all I have.

Aside from the lack of sales, it wasn't too bad. I sat for three hours, read nearly half of my book, and tried not to stare at people walking past lest I scared them. I've wasted my time in worse ways.

I have until mid-February to decide on whether to try the bigger, appropriately-named Super Comic City. I'll see I can handle more protracted sleep deprivation and ego-bruising by then.

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Writing this week. I thought of joining in on Month of Letters, but postage is nearly $1 a letter around here. Screw that noise. I came up with a better plan. 

Work has started up, and as a result, I've started to consume more than create. Exhaustion plays a part, no doubt, but only a part. It might be that the great surge of productivity I was riding is at its end. It also might be that I am falling back on bad habits. Once I get home and sit down, it takes an hour or more for me to get around to doing anything, a problem when I don't get home until pretty late.

That's just an excuse, though. I bet I can get more done if I actually tried, or wanted to... or tried.

That said, here's some gibberish about the media I've been consuming:

( Welcome to Night Vale, Boys' Love comics, and Kill la Kill.... )

Finishing up everything for Comic City next week. (Only 10 days away and there's still so much to do. ...How likely is it that I sell anything?) Thinking of making a costume for the occasion, or at the very least shaking the dust off one of my wigs.

It's a shame that I lose several hours a day staring into space, thinking about nothing... trying to forget that I exist suck have things to do.

I keep thinking about joining in on A Month of Letters. If I do, my mother and sister are going to be getting a lot of letters from me in February. (It'll be just like the New Year cards every year. I make them, but I only have one or two people to mail them to. It's rather sad, isn't it.) They won't be the only recipients, but I think they'll be the only ones not annoyed by my letters. (At least, I hope they won't be annoyed...)

You know, I think I'm getting better.

Slow week. I kind of took a two, three-day break from doing anything after New Year's. I did try to sew something up (a pouch that looks like the traveler from Journey), but it wasn't exactly working.

There's also the problem of getting ready for Comic City.

So far, I've tweaked the bunny!Snape picture and redid an older picture of Harry for the postcards. AND, I've been working on some bookmarks.

Work is a bit slow-going, though. I'm still having trouble starting, but once I start, I have been pretty good at staying on target. At the same time, I still get hung up on occasion, particularly when I have to start the next step. (Example: I sketched today's doodle... then stopped for ages before the linework... then stopped again before starting the color... then stop again to think about whether my art has improved at all...)

If anything, I'm definitely getting a lot of practice. My hands are still a bit crap... and does Harry look like a Disney prince to you, or is it just me...

Tomorrow's the semi-officlal end of winter vacation, and only, what, three weeks left to get everything done? (I'm not panicking. There's no time to panic...)

No writing this week. Maybe later.

Happy Boxing Day. I hope you got everything you wished for, or the money to buy it later.

I did get a nice present late last night: My table assignment for Comic City Tokyo. God, I still get very, very jittery thinking about it. Me, a hack and a lazypot, manning a table at a comic market.

I'm both very excited and very, very scared.

It's a good spot, too. Let me see...






For those that have never been, the table are set up in rows and columns (very clever), with walking areas breaking them into blocks. I have a spot facing not the narrow space between rows, but facing one of the walking areas. HOW did I get this lucky? (Is it lucky?)

Oh God. Getting jittery again. Just have to make sure I have a lot of fun stuff to share/sell, and to relax and have a good time, too, right? Oh God....

Struggled mightily with my new year's postcard. All I needed to do was draw a horse, but that somehow always led to a Harry Potter doodle.

Oh God. Panicking already, and it's only 31 days away... oh god...

I haven't posted in a while, mostly because I've been too busy feeling ashamed working. I did write something, but it's not particularly good. I wrote it mostly to get it done and off my ever-growing list of stuff to do.

Another thing on my list: Getting a table at a comic market. There is one coming up in two months, a small one that wants $40 for half a table. That's not that bad, I thought, but I kept trying to talk myself out of doing it. "I'll be alone and foreign in a sea of Japanese people." "I won't be able to make everything I want to sell in time." "No one will be interested in my stuff, and it'll be a huge waste of time."

I had to flip a coin to force myself to decide.

Tonight, I spent the last two hours trying to fill out the entry forms. I didn't finish it, because I can't figure out what section I belonged in. At first, I thought I should sign in for the books/Harry Potter section, but, the more I read, the more I realize that I probably belong in the clothes/accessories section.

I pretty much gave up after that. At least for the night. I still have until the 8th, but I might just talk myself out of it again...

The picture is supposed to be my, um, "circle's" pamphlet entry. Took 15 minutes. Will probably be never used, ever.